I forgot. Dates, places, people. Not just any dates, any people and any people. Ones who mattered, ones who cared, ones that were unforgettable, per se.
What drives us to change our selves? Is it always a drive, or are there times you get nudged or ‘pushed’ into something that you never wanted, or needed?
Easy for any adult to say, nope, no one can MAKE you do anything you don’t want to. What about unions that are arranged? People we are ‘supposed’ to like and be nice to. Or whom we will grow to, if not at first sight.
And then there are those whom we just lock eyeswith across a crowded airport lounge and feel like we belong amidst all the chatter and faces, there is a camaraderie inexplicable. Some we are attracted to so bad, our knees turn weak at even a glimpse.
What exactly is love?
Is it a feeling, an emotion or, as Steven Covey said, a verb? Is it what happens or what grows or what is built? Is it controllable, predictable and calculated?
Love begins with either a ‘push’ or a ‘pull’. You like a person. Period. That may be lust, or a physical reaction. Or an emotional one, after getting to know someone, you just develop such a strong pull that it refuses to exit your senses. It simply envelopes you.
If you are pushed into a love-stricken relationship, you HAVE to behave in a certain manner, court em, wine and dine em.. agree to the whims, the insanity, accept all that is said and done.
And then there is the unconditional kind. That knows no heaven nor earth. That just is. How and why, never can figure it out. Love is in everything around you. You just need to open your eyes and believe in your capacity to love. Love the dulling or the throbbing that restricts all your abilities to function the way you used to, the way you were. The way you can never be again. Once you take the plunge, you will be another. Part of a whole. And you change. So do they. We forget that we are human. We don’t change our cores, our essence. We may alter on the outside or seemingly so, but we never really become something that we were not to begin with. We have had our destinies chalked out at birth, we become people we are raised to, we are surrounded by or perhaps the opposite of. We have the minds and hearts of toddlers, we make decisions that may seem rash or absolutely certain. Destiny and fate are what not many believe in any more. You and I choose to follow a path or halt in our tracks. We wake up and smell the roses, we think we have fallen out of love as swiftly as we fell in.
It is not my place to tell you what to do. It is always you who must do what you want, need or can’t NOT do. Be wise, be selfish. No one is better or worse than you or than they were an eon ago. Decide who you need in your life and who you don’t. Do what you want.