Goodbyes and hellos, what differentiates one from another? Once you say one, only then can you say the other. If you let something go, then you have the chance to have another moment, another feeling, another laugh, another tear..
Knowing when to give up, when to not try any more, when you have to move on, is a hard and often tricky task. What is it that makes us change our mind or decide to choose? There is always a choice, for we are creatures of our own doing.
We choose to stay, we choose to go, we choose to suffer, we choose to move on. We do choose. It isn’t always fate or destiny, or a higher power that alters the course of our actions. We are masters of our journeys. We walk the path, we talk the talk. We learn to make promises we can’t keep, and still we keep promising.. hoping, praying, begging in our hearts that no one notices, no one’s the wiser. We make commitments, we say what we don’t mean. We do what is expected, not what are in the capacity to.. Why? Because we have learned it the hard way. It is easier to tell white lies, pacify not another, but one’s own self into a false sense of a safe oasis that we occupy in our minds.
It takes a large amount of courage to wake up and smell the roses. See things and people for what and who they really are. See your self in the mirror when you wake up in the morning and realise you are not who you want to be any more. You are now your worst nightmare. All the mascara and all the gloss in the world can not mask the lack of reality that you feel and are an excrutiatingly painful part of. The seemingly calm demeanor and absolutely casual face may fool a stranger easily, and even ones you love, but can you fool yourself?
Make a choice. Walk away.
If it doesn’t feel right, if it doesn’t work for you anymore, if it is destroying you, if it is giving you nothing, if it is slowly sucking all the happiness out of you, if it feels like dirty stinking COMPROMISE, walk away!
Yes, we do learn to give and take, see the pros and cons, calculate, measure, prioritize. But not our souls. Not our hearts.
Nothing can bring you joy, except the choice that you make to let your self be at peace.
I know how much I hate goodbyes, but there are a million hellos out there.
And each farewell may not be final.
Don’t forget the love, support and ecstasy that you share, cherish it and live.
To die another day.